Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas from the Alcoholic Chimps! Next year Festivus celebration in Maricopa. Trophy thinks I'm faking but it's on, see you there. And have another cup of cheer.

Been Awhile

Sorry for the lapse, been pretty swamped. Still here with more content to follow soon.

Beer Makes Me Healthy!

I was just reading one of my favorite blogs, Boing Boing, when I found this wonderful article, Bio Beer. Beer has done so much good for us and she never asks for anything back. Thank you sweet beer, we love you.

First off, this blog is supposed to be jovial and fun, the website can be serious if it chooses to be. Website? What, huh?

What I want to say is that I am very proud right now where AMerica stands. Probably because I served her I have always had a degree of worry for OUR country, but tonight I feel a particular hope. Politics aside we have now witnessed something many never expected to happen. It is reassuring that AMerica can put aside it's fears and trepidation. To all my friends, Republican, Democrat, or other, thank you for making tonight what it was; an historic event that we will tell our grandchildren about many years from now.

A toast to you AMerica. Thanks for being beautiful.

Ask and you shall receive....

Jonny wondered if Meatball could find a gayer picture...he couldn't, but I could!!

Bucky

Brother Bill

Sometimes called Bare Calf.

Pung (me)

Short and to the right.

Moose

De

De's the bald one.

Jonny Bananas

And Here You Go...

The moment you have all been waiting for, here are The Chimps!

Starting with our very professional business card made one drunken night at a kiosk;

It's Always Better With Music

Not trying to one up the Trophy Wife but really, the only thing better than a video of a chimp on a Segway is a song about a chimp on a Segway while watching the video of a chimp on a Segway. Might just be my new ringtone.

Who Are The Chimps?

There are many stories that will be told, some of them true, most of them fictional, but they all involve the same group of six wild and crazy guys that were stationed in Germany together in the early '90s. There was always six Chimps and there will always be six Chimps, no more, no less.

Over the next few days I will post pictures of the brothers six so you will be able to put a face to each and everyone's name. Until then have a pint or two on us. And if you see Bucky, De, Moose, or Bill tell them we're here. Thanks.

It was fun while it lasted...

Thank you, Meatball, for so graciously allowing me to "officially" invade your vanity blog. I'm not sure it will be as much fun making fun of you boys this way, but I'll give it a shot. I'll even make you a deal...if you can get a quorum of Chimps to show up, I'll withdraw my snarkiness to the comments section. Good luck!

I see Mr. Bananas remembers the "poster that started it all" much differently than you do. I know I wasn't there, but I gotta say...I always imagined the origin of the beloved chimps more like this:

What's all this, then?

You fat bastard... You're welcome. That poster is not THE poster. As I remember it, it was a monkey leaning against a soccer goal post, holding a beer. I believe we were also referred to by "the establishment" as a bunch of drunk monkeys, collectively, we decided that Alcoholic Chimps sounded slightly more sophisticated. I have our business cards, a T shirt, a hat, and one or two memories from those days. However, since the summer of 1994, I've seen Brad once, Billy once, and the rest of you bastards; not at all. You got no love for your hoes?

A Hacker Among Us!

Chimps beware, we still like the luvin' but the girls still don't. My wonderful wife hacked into the blog and added her own little posts. Until the real poster from 1993 is dug up I'll continue to add random drunken monkey pics to the blog.

And yes Jen, they were funny.

The Origin of the Chimps

I'm often asked where exactly this crazy bunch of soldiers came up with such a wacky name for ourselves. It's hard to believe that it can all be traced back to a poster! You're not going to believe it, but I'VE FOUND THE POSTER!! I don't believe any other explanation is necessary...a picture is worth a thousand words!!

The Chimps' World Tour

Calling all Chimps!

So it's come to this. Every time I find a Chimp they fall off the face of the earth never to be found again. Or, if found, in much worse wear then originally remembered. So here is the mission for all of you crazy kids;

FIND THE CHIMPS!

For each Chimp found you will receive a commemorative European Tour t-shirt once they're made, which I truthfully have no idea when I'll make them but I feel that you at least deserve the promise of a reward for finding my lost brothers rather than nothing at all.

And if you're wondering what or who The Alcoholic Chimps are just stay tuned, I'll be explaining it soon.